IVF: Where I’m at so far

June 1, 2014

If you’ve been following me on Instagram, you know that our IVF journey has begun and I’ve been taking twice daily injections for the last 5 days. I started a private blog to keep a journal of all the things I’m going through so as to not flood this one with all of that. I know it’s not everyone’s cup of tea, but it helps me to write out our experiences and perhaps one day I’ll share it publicly, but for now I’m keeping it to myself.

I will share however, that the daily injections aren’t as bad as I anticipated. The actual needle stick in my belly doesn’t really hurt (the needle is really teeny tiny) but some of the medications sting going in so I just inject it so ridiculously slow and pause in between plunges when it starts to burn until it subsides, then keep pushing. It’s all mind over matter though. That first jab was SO scary I cried when I was done, even though it didn’t hurt, and I walked around my house babbling like an idiot to myself and shaking until I calmed down enough to do the next one. I have to psych myself up before I jab each one in even after doing it for 5 days.

When Brian helps me, he hands me the syringe and then takes a step back like I’m a firework about to explode or something! It’s so funny. He’s not a fan of needles (and neither am I!) so there’s no way he’d want to do the injections for me, I wouldn’t want him to either. I like having the control of that.

But so far the side effects I’ve been having are some slight cramping, a few headaches and feeling tired. I thought I’d be a crazy hormonal lunatic but it’s still early yet. I’m assuming I still have about another week of these injections before the dreaded egg retrieval, which is tentatively planned for either June 6 or June 9, but these things can change in an instant depending on blood test results or ultrasounds. So who knows.

But I am still scared of everything that could go wrong. I try so hard to take it day by day. And having a sense of humor helps a lot. But most importantly I’m trying to stay hopeful that this will be our time and there’s a light at the end of this emotional/mental/physical/financial stress tunnel.

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