My irrational fear of silent films

May 20, 2013

I have a completely irrational fear of silent films from the 1920s. I’m not sure where or when this started, but I do know that if I see one while flipping through the channels, I get a visceral reaction to it. I seriously get a stomach ache. So just for shits and giggles, Brian put on the silent film Nosferatu on Netflix and immediately I was too horrified to look away. From cringing and squealing through the entire movie, I came to the following conclusions as to why these types of movies freak me the hell out (besides the fact that this one is about a creepy Vampire, all silent films make me feel this way)…

-The actors eyes are really dark on their lids and under their eyes because of makeup or shadows from poor lighting, but yet the whites of their eyes really stand out which gives off this incredibly eery feeling.

-Then, with those creepy eyes, they sometimes look at the camera which makes me feel like they are looking right through the tv set knowing I am on the other end. What the fuck!

-Their hair usually looks really coarse, kind of like a wig. And wigs tend to get like that when they are old. And old = dead. Basically hair is dead so it’s just another reminder about death which is what I think is going to happen to me if I keep watching.

-The jerky fast movements and light fluctuations make me feel like they are going to jump out of the tv and grab me and drag me into their hellish silent world. Maybe this is because of The Ring where the girl actually does come out of the tv with that same jerky fast motion.

-If they did manage to drag me into their nightmarish world, I would be screaming my head off, only no one would hear me because its a fucking silent film!

-Knowing that all these actors are dead makes me feel like they are ghosts. Even any animals included in these movies as well.

-And this last part makes absolutely no sense even to me. I almost feel like I have gone back through time to another dimension and am actually standing there behind the camera watching the story take place as if it were real….like an invisible voyeur. And I am trapped and am praying that I’ll wake up any second because it’s all a bad dream, right?

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